I will never forget the day we received the message from my sister, Mary, who happened to be visiting family in Nebraska at the time; It was a cold day on February 28th and the year was 1976. Mary began experiencing heavy bleeding and knew she and her baby were in serious trouble. Labor had started and they couldn’t stop it. At one point in her long day of labor someone suggested she terminate the pregnancy knowing her child would not have a fighting chance. Mary said “No, we will let God decide what He has in store for this child! He knows the reason for Jason being born.”
He was born at 12:25, the first baby of the leap year. They explained to Mary that they would not be giving him the credit for this because it was highly unlikely that he would survive. The major concern was that Mary was only 26 weeks pregnant at the time. Fourteen weeks early in 1976 was pretty frightening. When she called it was early in the morning. “His name is Jason Scott and he weighs two pounds.” She has keepsake pictures showing her husband holding him in the palm of his hand.
“I am so worried right now”, she said in her phone call. “The doctors believe that he may not pull through. If he lives which is a huge concern, he will likely not walk, not talk, and will always have to be hand fed; he will surely be in a wheelchair all his life. They said I would always have to diaper him. He has severe brain damage and he will need to take medications to control seizures. Essentially he will always have to be cared for. He is so little and is fighting so hard to live.” When asked if she had any regrets she said, “I know in my heart God took the decision about this child directly away from me. He wanted Jason here. Jason is in his hands. I just have to put my trust in God.”
Jason would have to stay in the hospital for three months. Mary was going to have to stay in Nebraska so she could be with him. Her husband headed back home to help with the other kids. Jason did survive. Mary took him home to Oregon weighing 4 ½ lbs. He was diagnosed with Hydrocephalus when they returned home along with severe brain impairment. Eventually, they began the routine of caring for him and their other children. Mary went on to have a fourth child a year later.
As for Jason… He just celebrated his 40th birthday. He does walk. He attends Imagine Possibilities, formerly known as the ARC of Washington County in Oregon. He has learned to communicate with a book that is filled with pictures. His family is in the book along with many things he likes to do. For example, he is accomplished at letting everyone know when he wants a cheeseburger with fries and a Diet Coke. He has learned how to use an Ipad, which allows him to recognize words and pictures and simple games. He feeds himself, and is well versed in communication for someone who doesn’t use words. Going out to restaurants is his favorite thing to do. He will even look through the mail for coupons for his preferred places to eat and give them to Mary knowing it will allow them to do it more often. He laughs a lot when he is happy, which is often. Occasionally he gets angry, sometimes when a great deal of confusion is around him. He experiences pride when Mary tells him “good job” for taking out the garbage every day. Overall, he is a pretty happy guy.
Jason has even met with a President. President Clinton was in Oregon campaigning for his wife. After his presentation explaining reasons to vote
Jason as an adult with his sister
for her, he came off the stage and went immediately to meet Jason. Mary and I were a little surprised and felt pretty special to be with Jason that day. Mary discussed the programs in Oregon for special needs people like Jason. Mr. Clinton told us that his wife helped sponsor the American with Disabilities Act. She is passionate about children with disabilities having access to schools and adults with disabilities having access to jobs. Mary explained to President Clinton about Jason’s limited capabilities and even about his book. At this point in the discussion, Jason reached in his fanny pack and showed President Clinton a picture of a Diet Coke. He smiled and asked someone in his secret service detail to get the Diet Coke for him. Mr. Clinton told Mary he felt honored to meet Jason. He commented, “I will remember him that’s for sure.”
In Mary’s words, “I’ve raised four children; all four were a joy. She is retired now and cares for Jason daily. Her other children are married with families and busy lives. But they all remain devoted to Jason. He has certainly surpassed many of the expectations told to them when he was born. When Mary is asked about Jason being a burden, her response is “Jason is my gift. I am honored to be the one to carefor him.” Mary serves on the board of directors at Imagine Possibilities and for several years has helped with fundraising so Jason will always have a special place to learn.
Many people have special needs people to care for in their lives. There are many challenges associated with caring for them. For example, I’ve watched Mary shower and bathe Jason and yes diaper him at night. It seems like a huge commitment to me. But she is doing it out of love for her son.
You’ve heard the saying “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” Sometimes it seems that He does give us too much too handle. Then again, I don’t think we always know at the time, but certainly we learn about God’s capacity to love and teach others when giving us challenging obstacles to overcome. I believe that’s what Jason does every day of his life. It would seem strange to Mary’s family and ours if Jason weren’t in it. He brings everyone joy. I suppose it’s clear now that we all know what God must have known the day Jason was born. Well done to you Mary for bringing Jason into all our lives!
Catherine Mendenhall-Baugh (Cathy) completed her education at the University of Nebraska majoring in Special Education and minoring in English Literature and now works in the insurance industry. A mother and a grandmother, Cathy grew up in a large Catholic family and as spent the last 30 years as a caregiver for her husband, Jack. A writer for Tuscany Press, she is also working on several longer writing projects.
